Things to do before I die
by Child of Insanity
Summary: Would things have turned out differently if he had cared? Ray/Kai [SUICIDE]


~Things to do before I die~  
  
What do you want? Kai watched from his position on his bed as Ray flinched at the coldness of his words, but couldn't bring himself to care whether he hurt the other teen or not. He had, howerver, expected to feel some sort of amusemet at Ray's rection, and was surprised when he didn't. There was only a dull sense of acknowledgement that Ray had reacted at all, nothing more. He was further surprised by Ray's reply.  
I'm bored. Ray told him. And Tyson dragged the others out to get something to eat. He sat himself down on the opposite end of the bed to kai, and pulled his knees up to his chest. What are you doing?  
Kai blinked at him. he offered gruffly, hoping that Ray could take a hint and leave.  
It didn't seem as though he could. Ray raised an eyebrow at the book in Kai's lap, and grinned. Nothing? Sure... And stayed where he was. Battle me? he asked, after several moments of dull silence in which they simply stared at each other.  
Kai replied simply. He wasn't in the mood for a Beyblade battle. Go away? he added hopefully.  
Ray shook his head. No. I don't want to. he yawned, stretching his arms above his ahead, and causing the shirt that he was wearing to rise slightly and reveal a small amount of pale skin. He curled himself up contentedly at the foot of Kai's bed, and yawned again, before closing his eyes.   
There was silence for several minutes as Kai tried, and failed, to start reading his book again, and Ray, to all outward appearances, went to sleep.  
It's cold isn't it, Kai? Ray said suddenly, sitting up and wrapping his arms around himself. Kai thought he could see goosebumps on the other teen's pale arms.  
So go find a heater. Kai told him coldly.  
Ray shook his head, and started moving down the bed towars Kai, an almost wicked glint in his eyes. I don't want to do that either.  
Kai corrected himself, the glint in Ray's eyes was predatory. What *do* you want? he asked, half-afraid of receiving an answer.  
Ray was practically sitting in his lap by that point, and Kai found himself backing into the wall. Ray's lips twitched into a half-smile, and he rested a hand on Kai's knee. I want this.  
Before he had a chance to react, Kai felt Ray's lips press against his own, in a soft and exceedingly brief kiss.  
Ray was smiling when he pulled back, and his amber eyes seemed brighter than usual, although not with happiness. Kai was at a loss for what to say, and stared at Ray blankly.  
You have soft lips, Ray told him, then kissed him again.  
This time Kai found himself responding, and Ray gasped in what Kai assumed to be surprise. Kissing Ray had never crossed Kai's mind as something that he would, or wouldn't, do in his life, but he decided that all in all it wasn't a bad experience.  
Voices announced the return of the other three Bladebreakers, and Kai pulled away, unwilling for them to see him with Ray.  
I wish we could have done that earlier. Ray whispered, staring down at his hands, clenched tightly in his lap. When he looked up at Kai, his expression was said. I'll go now.  
Kai watched him as he walked to the door, and wondered whether he was imagining the unsteadiness in the other teen's step. He dissmess the thought though, as Ray tunred back around briefly, and smiled at him.   
Thank you. Ray said, then turned and walked out of the door, a small piece of white paper falling from his hand as he did so.  
With the sound of Tyson greeting Ray enthusiastically coming from outside his room, Kai crossed the room and picked the piece of paper up.  
It was a list, written neatly in blue ink, and titled 'Things to do before I die.' Kai read through it quickly, mouth feeling sandpaper dry. Each point on the list had a small tick next to it, except for the last one, the one that made Kai's chest tighten as he read it. 'Kiss Kai.'  
He wasn't really surprised to hear the other Beybladers suddenly yell Ray's name, nor was he really surprised when later, he found an empty bottle of pills next to Ray's bed. He was, however, surprised by the amount of pain that he felt as he ticked off the last point on Ray's list, and by the grief that he felt at Ray's death. He couldn't help repeating what Ray had said to him after they'd kissed, when he'd told him that he wished they had kissed earlier. He couldn't help but wonder what he'd meant by that, and whether Ray's death could have been prevented.  
He was confused as to why Ray would have done such a thing, and as hindsight is ever perfect, he couldn't help but wish that he had cared in time.  
~FiN~  
  
A/N: I realise that there was a fair bit of OOCness in this fic, but in Ray's case, that was mainly due to the large amount of pills he had taken. Trust me, people act different when they've tried to OD on medicine.


End file.
